In the mind of a drunk

This is a letter written by a friends sister. It is a great example of how drunk drivers think. Drunk drivers have the feeling that they have the right to drive drunk. They genuinely do not understand the seriousness of what they are doing. They typically think that they are being punished way to severely when they are caught. The truth is usually quite the opposite. As with all conversation blogs, my commentary is in parenthesis.

(This is the initial letter written by my friends sister)
Good morning. :o) Just wanted to pass on the latest DUI crap for you – (Name deleted) is a useless turd of a lawyer. I could have saved myself $1000, done this all myself, and gotten the EXACT same result. Actually, I would have done a better job - I'd have had my license 2 weeks longer, and I'd have finished this last November. I received a letter from him over the weekend, advising me that gee, sorry, but the prosecutor is not inclined to ignore the breathalizer, (spelling?) so shucks, you'll be getting 2 days in jail, a year license suspension, $1100 fine. Oh, and by the way, if you don't change your plea to guilty on the 15th when we go back to court, the prosecutor is also going to tack on a wreckless (Spelling again?) driving charge. Have a nice day, (Name Deleted), call me next week. Oh, but on the bright side, you're eligible right now to apply for a restricted license, so I can drive to and from work - I spoke to the DOL about this, and confirmed that before I even submit my application, I have to have the interlock device installed and SR22 insurance - and if they say deny my app, too bad, I just wasted my money. Every piece of advice he gave me was flat out wrong or useless., not to mention the completely lazy approach he took to my entire case. The only thing he's proven good for, is that with him there, I get in and out of the court room faster, because without counsel, you just wait your turn. He advised me to pay $200 for the DOL administrative hearing - My punishment for that was that they moved my suspension date up from 10/20 to 10/06. Cute. He advised me to do all my classes and shit before going to court, because the prosecutor would see that as good faith, and they'd be sure to ignore the breathalizer. (You should see if you can couple that with a spelling and grammar class) My punishment for that is not only did I have to take a 3 month continuance instead of being done with this in November, because (lawyers name deleted) never bothered to call the prosecutor before we showed up for court, but now they are going to tack on a wreckless driving charge if I don't just roll over. I started my classes a few weeks before my first court date - quite frankly, I could have just waited, and it really wouldn't have made a damn bit of difference. Not to mention the completely lazy approach he took to my entire case. I had to call him repeatedly, he never once called me back when he said he would, and he acted like this whole thing was just no big deal, treating me like a 5 year old who's impatient for a cookie every time I called him. I fully intend to let him know my thoughts on how he handled this, and to make sure he knows I certainly will not be sending him any more clients. So. When I go to court on the 15th, I'll be changing my plea to guilty and bending over to take the big judicial boot in the ass. God knows horrible criminals like me must be punished to the fullest extend (You mean extent, right?) of the law. (The first good thing you have said, to bad it’s sarcastic)Hope ya'all (yee-haw!) are paying close attention - Don't get yourself a DUI. (Let’s rephrase, don’t drive while intoxicated) And remember - that doesn't just mean drinking and driving. It's driving under the influence of ANY drug. Even cold medicine can do it for you don't laugh, it's the truth. (So don’t drive on cold medicine idiot!) Also remember, you don't have to register a .08 or higher on the breathalizer (Jesus Christ it’s spelled breathalyzer!)- They can get you on a .02 if they decide you drove poorly because of it. And you will not get off, and the court will not be lenient on you because you're such a nice person and you've never been in any trouble before in your whole damn life. (Same with murder and rape. Hmmm, actually I can’t think of any crime where they are lenient on you because you are a nice person.) They don't care. I am not joking - don't even have a single drink before you get behind the wheel, and for God's sake, don't do anything else and go for a drive either. (YES!) If you happen to get caught driving under the influence of something illegal, your punishment will be even more severe. Oh, and let me take it one step further - The car doesn't even have to be moving. The keys do NOT have to be in the ignition, the car does NOT have to be running, you don't even have to be awake!!! Seriously! If you are IN the car, and the keys to the car are IN your possession, yep, even if they're in your pocket or purse, not even in your hand, you can still get nailed - Because you have "physical control" of the vehicle. And the punishment is exactly the same. So, if you get real shitty and decide to sleep it off in your car, throw your keys in the trunk, of course, make sure you've got a button to get you back in the trunk to get them later - it wouldn't be cool to sober up and find yourself walking home anyway. It's hard for a cop to say you were in physical control, when your keys aren't even on your person. It's not worth it - Take a damn cab. (True)

(This is my friends response to her sister)
Sounds like a lot of stuff to have to take care of. Love you dearly, kiddo. Good advice not to drink and drive.... Check out Justin's blogs about his experience when he was nearly killed by a drunk driver. Good church going man, pillar of the community and blah blah blah. (The drunk that hit me, not me lol) Justin will have a limp the rest of his life, has several scars, more surgeries to come, constant headaches and is unable to ride in a car unless he is driving, due to anxiety. He was drunk too. He called his wife for a ride home. He did the right thing. He still was nearly killed by a man that didn't do the right thing. www.nomoredrunks.blogspot.com (My friend accidentally hit "Reply All" instead of just "Reply" oops)

(My friends sister responds privately) Thanks, needed the extra guilt trip. You've been incredibly supportive all along. I hope I can do the same for you, when you make a stupid mistake.

(My friends private response) I'm really sorry that you feel I've shunned you over this, that isn't the case at all. I DO hope that it works out for you, I DO love you VERY much, but I DON'T feel that I should be all mushy mushy poor (name deleted) over this. Yes, it was a stupid mistake. Yes, it blows. Yes, you broke the law. Yes, you have to take the consequences, whatever they may be. I would feel the same no matter who it was. Sorry you don't like it. I do love you though. (An excellent response)

(Now my friends sister responds publicly)
Thank you, dear sister, for the blog address. And thank you for once again reminding me that you have a friend who was hurt by a drunk driver, lest I forget. (Not just hurt dear, almost killed. Read the blog, your part of it now.) You know, forgive me if I'm wrong, but - I'm pretty sure never along these past months have I once indicated that I somehow DON'T know that I did the wrong thing. It's called a mistake. (It’s actually called criminal.) Everyone makes them. Even you. (To my knowledge my friends mistakes have never been life threatening to other people.) And in my opinion, your response falls into that category. If you'd like to discuss further, please make it private - I don't think all of my friends need to see you treat me like a common criminal.

(Now my friends Sister in Law chimes in with a public response)
Sorry to learn you're such a worthless excuse for a sister. lol As far as I'm concerned you're an awesome "sister-in law" and one of the truly good people you run across so rarely in life.

(My friends public reply)
Wow. Wow, um,...I did NOT mean to hit reply all in my reply, THAT was a mistake. My not being proud of THIS mistake, NOT a mistake. I love you dearly kiddo, I always have, and I always will. Yes, we all make mistakes. Yes, even especially me. But NO, I don't think this one I have to roll over and feel sorry for you. HOWEVER, I HAVE NEVER, AND WILL NEVER CALL YOU A WORTHLESS EXCUSE FOR A SISTER, AND I REALLY DO NOT APPRECIATE THE IMPLICATION THAT I HAVE FROM SOMEONE I DON'T KNOW. Sorry for the previous reply all, it was not meant to go to everyone. This one is.

(My friends sister in law with a private response)
Hi. That was my smart-alec side responding to (name deleted) angry response to you. Please don't take it as being directed toward you. (Most of the time sarcasm just doesn’t fly in email. I usually recommend against it.)

(My friends sister with a private reply)
I never asked you to be mushy mushy - but I think asking you not to rub my nose in shit over it is a reasonable request. I won't bother updating you any further. You clearly agree with the state of Washington, that I am a criminal, and that's very sad. (Sad? You are a criminal. She is only agreeing with the truth!) I'm no more a criminal than you are. You absolutely have shunned me over this, you have treated me like I'm a disgusting worthless scab, and I think that's bullshit. (I have seen no evidence of this. If she is treating you like you are worthless it is not happening in these emails.) I would never do that to you. Never. I don't have any issue taking the consequences for my actions - I never have. I'VE always been very good at owning up to my mistakes and taking my lumps. I never blame anyone else for my problems - I know damn well I did this to myself. I had hoped to receive some degree of leniency, due to my spotless record and my sincere attempts at making good on my error. That's all. It's not to be. That's fine. I'm pissed at my lawyer, because he honestly gave me bad advice and misguided me and wasted my time. He should have just told me from the start, you're assed out, sorry. That would have been better. I never asked for your pity. And I didn't deserve your scorn either.

(and then my friends sister made a public reply)
Don't call me kiddo, little sister. It only makes you look silly.

(My friends reply)
Well, since I call everyone kiddo, older or not, and I don't find it silly at all, I will say it when I please. It's not meant to be a bad thing, it's a term of endearment that I use for people that I care about. And lastly this: And since when is being silly a bad thing? Some of my best memories are of us acting silly together.

(Now I chime in!)
Just writing to tell you that you fucking suck! You are bitching and moaning about something that YOU DID and the funny thing is that you are getting off light. A couple of days in jail, some fines, a license suspension. Fuck, you practically got nothing. If I was the judge I would have put you in prison for at least 5 years. I like how you said that you can’t believe that you are being punished for your one mistake. How ironic is it that? The only time that you ever drove a car drunk you got pulled over. The irony doesn’t exist because I guarantee that this was not the first time you drove drunk. This was just the first time that you got caught. It was this attitude of self entitlement that makes people think they have the right to drive drunk on our public roads. You should have to write an apology letter to everyone that was driving within a 50 mile radius of you the evening that you were pulled over. You should have to tell them all that you are sorry for putting their lives in danger. What a selfish little cunt you are. You think that you can just get into a car and drive intoxicated and then people are supposed to feel sorry for you because you got caught and have to endure some minor inconveniences? Fuck you! Some one exactly like you almost ended my life when I was doing the right thing by calling for a ride when I was drunk. Do I have to suffer because you went out drinking and didn’t plan ahead for a ride home? Did you ever stop to think that if you are in the place in your life were you need to drive while drunk that you might need to stop drinking. No I’ll bet that never crossed your mind. I am no prude; I drink all of the time. I DO NOT DRIVE DRUNK THOUGH! People who drive drunk are fucking assholes and they ARE CRIMINALS! So be happy that you are getting off so light. Oh, and take it easy on your sister, the fact that she is even still talking to you after the horrendous act that you did only speaks to her virtue and character. She is obviously being much more supportive than I would. Let’s just say that I ended a friendship with a close buddy of over 15 years because he got his third DUI. Your sister is going easy on you. Take your pills and shut the fuck up!